When There is so much Love, There is so Much Pain.

The love and the pain, give paradoxical effect to us. Well, guys please don't get me wrong... I'm not in love or something. This is not a romance story either. Apparently, I should appologize to all ( especially to romance story lovers), for such bombastic tittle that has nothing to do with boy-girl love story at all. Anyhow, love does not necessarily mean that kind of relationship because everyone knows that this word is so universal in nature. But, what I intend to tell is my passion in opthalmology that has grown into love. The passion is so deep that I just want to give my best, of which, of course to certain extent give so much tense into my mind. And I would like to share this feeling of mine with somebody because I'm going crazy if I not.

To begin with, lately, I feel intense pain all over my body. I knew this is not normal. The tense was so much that my physiological process have been disturbed. In the morning, I din't want to open my eyes, not to mention to get up from my bed. Puzzling for myself with this kind of phenomena, I start wondering.

"Well, this must be exam stress phenomena." (Practical Opthal examination is cooming soon) My brain gave the answer. "Ok then, c' mon, wake up, go to your book and start reading, there is much more to read." But, surprisingly, my body didn't want to follow my brain instruction. Owh, my god...the more my brain keep talking, the more intense the pain was...My stubborn body got stuck almost half and hour on the bed. It just moved left and right alternately, nothing else. What a waste of time, huh????

But thanks God. I finally threw my blanket off and jumped from my bed. Anyhow, its better late than never, ya??? ( Just an excuse to please myself =P). I finally read the book....although only three pages, because I had to met HIM at 5.30 in the morning.

The moral of the story is, dont think too much about exam or that kind of stuff. From my previous experience, I know it too well that this kind of craziness and nervousness always take away the best part out of me. Last year, I was labelled as "Miss patho", but in the final exam, I didnt really perform well. Try to perform the best but turn out to be merely a mess. I somehow, already set my mind up that..I just want to be myself...just be comfort with the situation. I perform the best when I can throw out my nervousness. To be frank, I got the right answer almost for all questions that the doctor asked during posting, because the situation was too casual. So, just know the subject well and I'll do just fine. Lets see how the thing going out then.

Love and pain, that make up among the flavour of life=)